The past can be an odd thing.
Each person has their own recollection of events.
And over time we can rewrite these events so many times to fit our own agenda that it is easy to forget the facts.
I’m a writer, I always have been.
Since I was a teen I kept journals of thoughts and feelings.
But equally in these journals I have only ever been able to write my truth. The truth of how events affected me. Of the emotions I was left with.
And I recognise that my emotional response would not be the same as others.
I know there are times in my life where I have not acted in others best intentions. Sometimes this was because I was blinded by my own hurt. Sometimes because I was just plain selfish. And sometimes I didn’t even consider how my actions could have effected others.
But ignorance should not be an excuse.
Once it’s acknowledged you should learn and educate yourself to do better.
I know with raising my kids I’ve not always made the best choices, but in that moment at that time I didn’t know better. I didn’t see how these things were wrong or how it could have hurt their core self.
And I’ve always joked that when the time came that I would pay for their counseling.
But the truth is, before we get that far I hope they’d find the strength to talk to me.
I’ve always tried to make it easy for them to talk with me about anything.
We’ve covered birds and the bees, my life experiences, their experiences and how despite sometimes the world is cruel, but it can still be beautiful.
And they have even found the strength to talk to me when my words or actions have caused them harm.
And I really hope as they move on with their new futures they can continue to do that with me.
We all need to live, learn and do better.