If I’m honest I don’t want to be here anymore.
I don’t know where I do want to be though.
Last night I just wanted to run. Run into the darkness and hide somewhere noone would find me.
Today I just don’t want to be in this house.
I feel everything I say is wrong or contradicted.
My head is loud, but I don’t want to do what it’s saying. That’s not my intention today, not the outcome I’m hoping for. Thats not the type of not being here I crave.
I want to be out in the wild.
Somewhere remote so I can scream until all the pain inside me comes out. And when I’m done screaming I hope my head is clearer so I can return.
But that feels a tall order at the moment.
I can no longer feel a time where my head is free or my words not bound within.
