Do you recognise me? Do you know who I am? This feeling of amnesia. I remember the old me. The business woman. The unstoppable force that could turn her hand to anything. Rotting lean-to? I rebuilt that in a week. Leaking toilet? I refitted the whole washroom over a weekend. A wasteland turned into a beautiful garden. That was me too. And then my body broke. It took a long time to adjust. The pattern of overdoing it, then suffering in pain and frustration. Oh that pain. It made me want to scream each time it hit. But my mind … Continue reading “Do you know who I am?”
Month: July 2023
My brain is broken
Yesterday I attended an appointment I’ve been waiting for since April. It’s been canceled a couple of time, and in my mind there was a lot riding on it. Maybe I put too much emphasis on this meeting.T he meeting was with a specialist to discuss my medication and potentially give me a diagnosis that would change the way my treatment plan moving forward would look like. Ahead of the meeting I spent time with my mental health nurse to check in how my week had been and to check in with how I was feeling in regards to the … Continue reading “My brain is broken”
The Pattern
If your close to me, I wonder if you’ve seen it too? The pattern. The self sabotage? It’s something I’ve grown to recognise in my life. Just when things are going good, I do something to mess it all up. Bring my world crashing down. This time it’s my job. Since closing my business I have struggled to feel comfortable and welcomed in the workplace. I have held down a couple of jobs, but I’ve never really been a proper fit. But at last, in August last year, I thought I’d found my place. The team was funny and made … Continue reading “The Pattern”